“That has to Hurt”

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“Pretty Hurts”, one can leave this interpretation up to their imagination, but in the self titled album, that Billboard states “sold 1.3 million copies in the first seventeen days,” Beyoncé expresses exactly what she means by the phrase. “My aspiration in life is to be happy”, Beyoncé answers as a contestant in a beauty pageant. In order for this process of true happiness to take place, love and confidence for oneself is important. Love for one’s true self. Not the self that Beyoncé says hurts. Not the blonde hair, bigger chest, longest nails, straighter teeth, and the skinny frame, but the body that you were born into. The image that God made you; who you are when you take off all make-up, take out the weave, and unhook the girdle that holds us up and in place. Do you love this self? This image?
The time is takes to try and transform into someone you think society will accept is time that could be devoted to uplifting yourself. A quick face of make-up takes about 10 minutes, time enough for you to read a motivational poem, time enough for you to look into the mirror and tell yourself you are beautiful. The money it takes to receive a procedure to “be like a supermodel” is the amount you can save for a vacation by yourself to the islands where you could escape from every voice that resonate negativity. Love the natural person first. Then you may begin to enhance your beauty with facial and hair products. Remember to keep the focus on the word enhance when defining what these products mean to you. Beyoncé says “perfection is the disease of a nation” one in which is contagious and spreads too rapidly through media. Stay grounded in your beauty.

(Photo from www.artsobserver.com/2012/08/23/a-survey-of-modern-and-contemporary-works-at-the-corcoran/)
"Afro.Died. T"

Loving not only your outside self, but your inside self which is the most important of all. Sit and think of what you identify as. What does this mean to you? I identify as a black woman. The significance of my identity means that I was made to be strong. Knowing that my race and gender come with struggles and automatic oppressions, who I identify as equals strength. This strength is what is portrayed in my actions. In my work. In my confidence. I know my flaws, my strengths, and they help shape my goals. Analyze yourself. Know yourself. There is a Greek term epimeleshai sautau that means to “take care of oneself” but in order to take care of oneself; the Greeks believed you had to know oneself. In the painting “Afro.Died T” by Iona Rozeal Brown, illustrates a gradual process of loss of identity during the process of “being perfect”. The long blonde hair and the blue eyes and lighter skin begin to take over who she really is. Her roots are still black and natural, her lips full, and her nose still larger, but as “society” begins to impose pressure on her to be perfect, she loses everything she truly is and was. Once you truly know who you are, the process of taking care of your body, mind, and spirit can take off. So ladies, be ready to take off not have a takeover, don’t lose yourself to “perfection” cause that has to hurt.

Ashley Gaddy, M.A

Confidence Coach
Director of Ashley Gaddy Enterprises

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